Tuesday, February 22, 2005


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Just for the record, why the name "Frenchbloke" when you're obviously not French?

There's actually no real reason. I was maintaining the Optimo website & was challenged to get more site traffic. Uploaded a Britney / Mount Florida thing & the name Frenchbloke was
born (primarily in case everyone hated it & sent out a lynch mob armed with big pointy sticks).

What are you up to these days?

I'm off (real) work with a collapsed arch on my foot, so plenty of time playing with software that makes noises. Also being prepared for the imminent arrival of our fourth child.

So what are the tunes that have been ringing in your head lately?

Lately? Err...the all singing & dancing Dsico's You Fight Like A Girl, Munk's Apertivo album, YMO's Technopolis & Renaldo & The Loaf's Bearded Cats.

If push comes to shove, what are the five of your all-time favourite albums?

Throbbing Gristle - D.O.A.
Kraftwerk - Autobahn
The Silicon Teens - Music For Parties
The Human League - Reproduction
Liaisons Dangereuses - Liaisons Dangereuses

Can you recall the first time you bought a record that was utter shite? Where did you buy it?

I've been blessed with the "Can you let me hear a bit of this?" attitude in shops. If they didn't, I didn't buy it.

Which artiste, other than yourself, have you ever wanted to be?

GG Allin or Tom Jones

So what happened to the working relationship of Frenchbloke & Son? Give us the full, uncut story please!!!

Basically, there was a lack of communication from all three parties. It wasn't till January 2004 that I found out what happened with the Bowie mixes I did (sadly "Laughing Gnome" wasn't available). My lack of interest in DJ-ing - I'd been knocking back things since 2001 - I am not a DJ. My past experience with the music industry as a whole makes me very wary. I'd been shafted in the past and wasn't going to let it happen again. The reason I handed in my notice in December 2003 was that I'd promised myself that if I heard the excuse of 'coming down here to make a go of things' once more that'd be it. And that was it.

I had a very nice eight months off. There is a cracker of a clause in the management contract that F&S had with Avalon stating that all the music must be original & does not breach the copyright of any third party or something. I neglected to mention that at the time of signing & was holding onto that in case it all went pear-shaped. I reclaimed the name...well...it was my name. I made it up. Nothing had happened with the name to warrant me not reclaiming it.

You've also seemed to have "retired" from doing mash-ups these days. What do you think about the direction bootlegs are heading these days?

Who said I'd retired? They seem to be going backwards instead of going forward. Back to the old school or something. The Linkin Park & Jay-Z [thing] isn't where they should be going.

If you were asked to do a greatest hits album for Frenchbloke, which 15 tracks would you choose to represent your entire bootlegging career?

"Right Behind", "Ich Habe Meine Bizkit", "Kraftwerk's Waltz", "Children's TV Theme No.1", "Destiny's Kennedys", & lots of bits & bobs that only ever cropped up in the mixes.

The Last of Frenchbloke:

Last blog that you visited that was brilliant = I can't say that I have.

Last encounter with the opposite sex that involved bootlegs = Seriously? Bastard 9 where the creepy woman was heckling us.

Last album you heard that gave you the creeps = Mamas & Papas Greatest Hits. Or anything by Wet Wet Wet.

Last concert you went to that was awesome = Kraftwerk, Glasgow, 1991. Or the Sahkö evening at Sonora, Glasgow in 1994 where Ø, Panasonic & Jimi Tenor played all evening. Fantastic.

Last mash-up you heard that made you wanna reconsider your "retirement" from bootlegs = But you still haven't answered my question: who said I had retired?

What is the most misunderstood thing about you that you would like to clear up here once & for all?

I'm not as scary as folks make me out to be.

There were some misunderstanding between you & IDC regarding a track of his appearing in your blog. What really happened?

I was demonstrating that the IDC mix of [Soundhog's] "Curdler", as compared with the Soundhog mix of [IDC's] "Scratch", was actually piss poor. Shite. Pish. A waste of hard drive space & time. But then, I'm no fan of IDC's work. I don't 'get it' must be a North-South thing.

In your opinion, should music be made free?

No. But once you buy it, it's then yours to do what you want. Make an ashtray, scratch the heck out of it...

If Michael Jackson asked you to do a boot to bring his credibility back, would you do it? What would your terms be? Humour us please...

That I'd be in total control. And that if no Jacko actually appeared on the track....& can my chair in the studio be against the wall please.

Let's play word association. We mention a name & you give us your thoughts...

IDC = Too big for his own ego. Totally over-rated. Sonically, a mess.
Eddy Temple Morris = A big kid let loose in a studio (in a good way).
Fad Gadget = R.I.P. Always two years ahead of Depeche Mode. Sorely missed.
Nick Kilroy = R.I.P. The man, or one of the men behind
Gabba.net. He really liked music.
Rainbow = Twangers...
DJ Zebra = Who?
Fini Tribe = Or Finitribe, depending on which record. The rosicrucian for fish, apparently. Showbiz chums, if you can call them that of mine.
GHP = Frankie Detorri. Over-rated. Totally.
Essex = The only place where I saw a handgun waved about in a car.
GYBO V4 = The new black.

Which genre of music do you consider the most "under-used" in bootlegs?

Opera, Gamelan, 'Early Music', Exotica, Steel-Drum band, & I dare say a lot more that'll spring to mind later.

What do you remember about the following years:

1979 = I was 11.
1983 = Saw Depeche Mode live for the first time.
1994 = My son was born.
1999 = Wasn't the end of the world.
2004 = Back With A Big F**k You.

What's your favourite Saturday night record?

Whatever I feel like listening to on a Saturday night.

And your Sunday morning one?

Whatever I feel like listening to on a Sunday morning.

Complete the following sentences:

I describe myself as... devastatingly handsome*

Music changed me by...it just did.

When it comes to vices...[it's] coffee & cake.

The last time I cried was... [when] my daughter was born.

My most treasured possession is...Liaisons Dangereuses "Los Niños Del Parque" 12" autographed. A present from Beate Bartel to celebrate the birth of my daughter Connie.

If I have any regrets...I'll regret them at that time.

When we die...we die.

Lastly, I'd like to be remembered as...devastatingly handsome*

Listen & Learn: A Frenchbloke Anthology Vol.1:
[All tracks are OFFLINE now]

01) Easy Charlie

02) Geetar Freak On

03) Destiny's Kennedys (By Frenchbloke & Son)

04) Hands Around My Cock

05) I Like Leather

06) Ich Habe Meine Bizkit (By Frenchbloke & Son)

07) Ugly Electric

08) Right Behind (By Frenchbloke & Son)

09) Dream House

10) Walk The Thong

11) Depeche Minogue

12) Sunshine Again

13) Walkable Balloon

And for a limited time only, click on the link below to grab Frenchbloke's latest mix:

Everything You Do Is Wrong

You can visit Frenchbloke's blog & read his ramblings here.

PS: Congrats on the 'latest addition' to your clan...